Mr. Donkey

A rural school is using a nonexistent teacher's salary to feed a water mule. This state of affairs, is however, endangered by an unexpected arrival of an inspector. He turns out to be looking for region's best teacher, eligible for American benefactor Ross' grant. A grease monkey repairing school's only bell is then dressed up and passed of as an English teacher, he is given a name Lǘ De Shui, almost same as the Donkey (驴 Lǘ) called 的水 (De Shui) . Luckily, the inspector knows no more English than the word "OK", hence the teachers celebrate receiving first 30000 yuan of grant money. However, to make the superstitious repairman undergo so much feared process of taking a photograph, female teacher, Yi Man, decides to sleep with him, making his lovesick colleague, Gui Shan, jealous. After being refused by Yi Man, Gui Shan spends grant money on expensive items such as a fur coat, and refuses to pledge in to build a new class room, as opposed to everybody else. Just before the inspector is going to come back again with Mr. Ross, repairman and her wife run in the school,the latter looking for the woman, with whom her husband had cheated. The repairman should not be seen by Mr. Ross, who is definitely able to tell him from an English speaker, therefore Yi Man reveals herself to lure the couple out, and gravely insults the grease monkey to make him lose feelings. When the inspector arrives, turns out he had been stealing 70000 yuan every month, and that Ross wants absolutely has to see Lu De Shui, the fake teacher. He comes in by himself, only agreeing to meet Ross if Yi Man is fired. Everybody convinces him to lower his demands, and he agrees to swap firing for insulting and cutting Yi Man's hair short, which is performed with great sorrow by the present, except for Gui Shan, who clearly enjoys calling his former beloved a dirty slut. In the end Yi Man commits suicide, and school's stablehand leaves with Ross for USA.