It all starts here! The first episode of a ridiculously long and pointlessly insightful discussion of Lord Foul's Bane. Watch the first episode as the girls interview the original and supreme Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Tadhg O' Higgins!
Thomas Covenant has just reached Pacific Bell to pay his bill. He is greeted by a hot chick who works there. She takes his bill and goes to the back room to check the status. A must see episode of the Fantasy Bedtime Hour with our Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Michael Lee!
Thomas Covenant finds himself falling into the precipice of his future after being hit by a car and struck in the head by a metaphorical spear. After bandaging his massive head wound, he realizes that he is deep within a cave filled with churros. A wretched figure is standing above him waving a staff. Thomas Covenant cowers in terror. Eating a churro, Lord Foul explains the doomed lineage of Berek Lord Father, Loric, Ravi Shankar and Kiril Threndar Heart of Thundar. Don't miss this compelling episode with our tallest Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Sean Knox!!!
As we begin Chapter 4, Thomas Covenant unexpectedly finds himself outside on a circular stone slab with Lord Foul no where in sight. He believes that he is still downtown after being hit by the car and the spear (from Episode 3). He is approached by a hot under-aged girl kind of like the teenage girls from pages 1 - 4 in Episode 1. When she sees his hand, she freaks out in hot teenage excitement, referring to him as "Berek Halfhand". Don't miss this dramatic episode with our most corporate Experts in Lord Foul's Bane, California Street Partners!!!
So you're new to the Fantasy Bedtime Hour and you've never read Lord Foul's Bane by Steven R. Donaldson...Well, don't worry! There's still time to catch up! In episode 5, we'll be showing all 4 of the Fantasy Action Sequences which are dramatic reenactments of pages 1-4, 26-30, 29-33 & 36-40. Supreme expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Tadhg O'Higgins, will answer all of our questions, viewer mail and explain the deeper meaning of characters like the Man in the Ocher Robe or the hot chic at Pacific Bell. Be sure to tune in for this riveting FBH compilation episode!!!
Thomas Covenant finds himself on a concrete slab on top of Kevin's Watch being woken up by a HOT teenage girl. Gasping for breath, she eagerly explains to him that he is in a place called "The Land". She really wants to go out with him because he looks like the famous Berek Halfhand. Thomas Covenant is annoyed as he doesn't specifically listen to anything the girl is saying. To his horror, he realizes that he will soon have to negotiate the mildly steep descent of the steps of Kevin's Watch with his leprosy ridden body. Don't miss this EPIC episode of The Fantasy Bedtime Hour with our first female Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Jennifer!!!
Atrium, the Hot Teenage Girl's mom, takes Thomas Covenant to the Stonesdown where she reveals to us (in song) The Legend of Berek HALF HAND, a heroic quest set in a time of uncertainty in the land. The future of civilization rests in the fate of the One Ring, which has been lost for centuries. Powerful forces are unrelenting in their search for it. But fate has placed it in the hands of a young Hobbit named Frodo Baggins. In an epic battle against the Shadow, Berek fights the corrupt King and loses half his hand! Seeing his dead comrades scattered around him, he flees and is pursued by the King for THREE days until finally he reaches Mt. Thundar and calls upon the power of the Stone Lions to defeat the King and his evil henchman. A must see Fantasy Bedtime Hour Episode with our newest Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Larry! All questions finally answered!
Atrium, the Hot Teenage Girl's mom, is taking Thomas Covenant to see the Council of the Lords so that he can deliver his precious little message from Lord Foul about the span of days upon the land, etc. What the Hot Teenage Girl's Mom doesn't know is that Thomas Covenant has just raped her daughter!!! Luckily Triock, the suitor of the Hot Teenage Girl, knows about the rape and is following them with plans of killing Thomas Covenant...and of course we're all rooting for that to happen because as you know we've always felt that Thomas Covenant is more than a little bit lecherous but now we know this to be the case and we really hope that Triock stabs him good. Don't miss this spirited Christmas Edition of the Fantasy Bedtime Hour! With our most cynical Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Ian Shoales (represented by his assistant, Violet)!
Atrium and Thomas Covenant have not spoken in days. They are still making the difficult journey to see The Council of the Lords. Thomas Covenant has been noticing a rotting smell that is becoming so intense, he can almost taste it and his sinuses ache. It is the smell of wrongness in The Land. As they reach the bottom of the hill, they notice a corpse and Atrium wants to enter it as is customary in The Land. However, her plans of violating the corpse are interrupted by the discovery of a violently murdered Waynhim! In sore need of council, they come upon Flaming Woodhelven and beg them for help only to receive an unexpectedly hostile welcome. Join us on Feb 6th and 20th for this must see episode with our very knowledgeable and super HOT Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Drew! All our most intimate questions and apparel finally answered and laundered!
WATCH as Heatherly and Julie are painfully guided back on track by Resident Supreme Expert in Lord Foul's Bane, Tadhg O'Higgins! LISTEN as Tadhg repeatedly corrects the girls for inaccuracies in the Fantasy Action Sequences! WRITE us if you have read Lord Foul's Bane and would like to be our next expert!