Down On The Farm

Ann and Adam Massingham's farm is a happy, busy affair: a tumbledown country retreat in which chickens roam, geese loiter and a goat called Charity struts around the outhouse like an Edwardian duchess. Unfortunately, that's where the fairy tale ends. For although the Massinghams' farm is a delightful agrarian idyll, their house is an absolute ruddy disgrace. There's hay in the bedroom, fungus on the windowsills and some sort of dungbased growth on the kitchen floor. Naturally, Kim and Aggie are appalled. "I'm appalled!" honks Aggie, scowling at a mug with black stuff in it. "Dirty beggars!" agrees Kim, as she extracts a cobweb the size of Kent from the sofa. It's a delightfully warm-hearted start to the domestic taskmistresses' latest series. With stentorian disapproval swiftly supplanted by cheery encouragement, the results are so dazzling that even Charity seems stirred.