Directions For Chas and Dave / Opening Titles / Chris Tarrant Intro, and Can I Have Your Glasses? / Aliens From Outer Space / Interrogating Bacon / Bernard Manning Joke / The Eurovision Gurning Competition (continued) / The Big Match Commentators / Houdi-Elbow / This Beer is Off / Sex Therapy Man / Bernard Manning Joke / The Disappearing Lady (Sally James) / Bob and Baby / Marriage Bureau Questionnaire / The Eurovision Gurning Competition (continued) / Yard of Ale and Elephant Impression / Sex Makes Me Bilious / Bernard Manning Joke / Chris Tarrant Link / London Girls by Chas 'n' Dave / Commercial Break / Alka-Seltzer / Mugger Express / Bernard Manning Joke / Marriage Confession / Rolf Harris Impression / Bob and Baby / Punks in a Pub / Man in Pyjamas / Sun Reporter at Breakfast / Charlsberg Lager / Nazi Song / Wedding Vows / Private Dentist / Two Women Talking / Ice Dance Champion / Avenge-a-Gram / Chris Tarrant Link / Bob Marley Tribute / Bernard Manning Joke / Link From Chris and Bo